I read the headline. I dared to hope it might be true. I clicked the link with fevered hand… and oh, what a pay-off!
It truly makes me proud to live in Manchester. I’m only disappointed that none of the news sites seem to have a picture of the momentous event. Given that the event happened at Manchester High School for Girls in Rusholme, the silver-topped perma-tan can consider himself lucky he wasn’t covered in curry. (Given the choice between that foreign muck and the honest, home-grown, hard-working, Anglo-Saxon kind, I think I know which he’d prefer.)
Needless to say, I will be glued to this week’s Any Questions to gauge the effect the attack has had on our hero’s ordinarily unshakable level-headedness and compassion for all humanity.
Obviously a moderate muslim attack, compared to what happens in Holland.
Expect a muck spreader attack on Canary Wharf next.
An acquaintance of mine once appeared on the Kilroy programme. She told me that before filming started the man himself warned the audience that if they wanted to attract his attention during filming, they could “touch my arm, but don’t touch the hair”. The thought of a bucket of animal shit being tipped over the hair in question is almost too enjoyable for words.
And here it is at last: phoographic evidence of Kilroy covered in shit as well as full of it. Awesome.
Man freed after Kilroy slurry attack